one of the biggest things i believe to be true about relationships is that you must make it feel safe for the people you love to call you out on shit. like obviously don’t let anyone emotionally manipulate or terrorize you but in general, in healthy adult relationships, there is always a pattern of rupture/repair. someone does something (unintentionally!) that makes someone else feel not great, and it needs to be addressed. the best thing you can do to preserve and improve your interpersonal relationships is to be open to these conversations. you have to be able to hear how your words or actions have affected someone, even if it absolutely wasn’t your intention, and you have to be able to simply acknowledge and apologize. it doesn’t matter if you didn’t see it that way. someone you love did, and they care enough to tell you, and that’s a gift. be grateful for the opportunity to do better.
